Sierra: ok you know how they say that babies can learn how to swim and hold their breath really easily underwater
Me: no. i can honestly say i have never heard that ever.
Sierra: well they do
Me:: that sounds like an excuse someone would say at a court case after accidentally drowning their child.
Me: You just sent out a blank email
Mom: darn
Mom: there was a picture in there
Me:: not to me
Mom: oh well, it was funny
Me:: haha terrific
Mom: any place better than aliquippa
Me: haha its not THAT bad
Me: i rarely hear gunshots
Mom: nice
Me: its the silent stabbings you gotta worry about
Mom: for sure
Sierra: “Hey, Casey! Don’t jump into that active volcanoe!”
Sierra: *swan dives* “YOU DON’T CONTROL ME!!!!!”
Sierra: *sizzle* *splash*
kcnovA23: black eyes look so bad ass
MsPennyRazzle: and eyebrow scars
MsPennyRazzle:: sexy
kcnovA23: ill see what i can do
MsPennyRazzle:: i mean like please dont take a knife to your face
kcnovA23: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH OH MY GOD ITS TOO LATEEEEEEEE AHHHHHHHHHHH WHY DID YOU MAAAAKE ME DO THISSSSSSSS
Carl: ugh fish had 5 more babies. was cute at first but i’m not trying to start the next Jon and Kate Plus 8 series over here.
Me: Get control of that tank man
Carl: dude it’s a brothel, I think we’re ok for now
Carl: or they have even more, which is very probable
Carl: i mean I do take very good care of it, change filter, clean the tank
Carl: so sets the moooood
Me: listen if im dying, just know its cool for you to break up with me dont want you to be a widow. dont feel guilty. i dont wanna drag you down with me hah
Sierra: …
Me: just letting you know
Sierra: for reals tho if you got sick id be by your side
Me: what if that side was oozing puss
Sierra: then we’d just have to wrap that up now wouldn’t we
Me: WHY AREN’T WE AT THE HOSPITALLLLL
Sierra: i mean we are…..
Me: WHY AM I TREATING MY OWN WOUNDS
Sierra: ill call a nurse??
Sierra: omg stop freaking out
Sierra: just a lil puss
Me: I’M DYINGGGGGG
Sierra: on second thought…id leave you
Me: thats my girl xoxo <3
(via GChat)
Carl: You wish u had more apps?
Me: eh nah has everything i need
Carl: Yeh Same here. Some clever ones but I don’t need all that shit
Me: yea like who needs fart machine
Carl: Hahahaaa
Carl: On second thought…
Me: downloading nowwwwww
Nicole: Jesus is not an alcoholic.
Nicole: Just has wine for blood.
Me: His blood alcohol level is 1.o
Me: That’s high.
kcnovA23: i wish ideas from my mind would just be dictated to paper rather then me having to actually write them out
MsPennyRazzle: lol pretty much the epitomy of laziness
kcnovA23: just named my autobiography
kcnovA23: that ill never write cuz it’d take too long